Is Marriage a Good Deal for a Young Man part 2

You can find the first installment in the series here

In the first part of this series we reviewed just a few common myths surrounding marriage and the male experience. For this part I would like to focus a bit on some of the benefits of marriage for men.

Men and Women are the original synergy

Contrary to popular belief, men and women are different. This shouldn't be an unpopular thing to say, but it is, and this leads to much confusion. There is a masculine and feminine energy to everything in creation, and entire philosophies and belief systems have been crafted around this observable truth. It is obvious to me that "the whole human" would consist of the perfect merge of the masculine and feminine. It is even more obvious to me that ultimately that is what marriage is supposed to be: the physical and spiritual merge of the masculine and feminine to create a whole. This isn't an original thought, as we know that entire belief systems contain this as a theme. This spiritual union is replicated in the physical when a man and woman have intercourse. This is not the only spiritual truth that is represented in the physical world, nor is this an original thought either ("As above, so below" - first recorded in the Emerald Tablet of Hermes Trismegistus dated as early as the 8th century).

So from the outset it should be stated that marriage represents the opportunity for a human to be whole in a spiritual sense. Therefore it is evident that by not experiencing this union one misses out on a significant part of what it means to be human. That said, lets go into some more of the practical applications.

But first a caveat:

Let me be the first to point out that our culture finds itself in an extremely corrupted state. This is observable fact, and nothing has not been touched by said corruption. The real Red Pill to be learned here is that culture has always been corrupt, because humans have been corrupted since the beginning of human history. There is no perfect society/institution because humans occupy them. Therefore no perfect human society/institution will exist, and for the answers to this I will refer you to any of the worlds religions to attempt to find the ultimate solution to this problem otherwise known as the human condition. So while marriage represents the perfect union of man and woman in the spiritual realm, there really isn't a such thing as a perfect marriage.

The thoughtful reader at this point will observe that instead of resorting to black pilling the state of marriage, the proper attitude to deal with this conundrum is no different than how you deal with any other aspect of an imperfect human experience: You do the best that you can.

So what to do?

As I eluded to in "Equally Yoked" and in "Things I Taught My Sons: Get the Girl" proper mate selection is critical. One of the ways that father's fail their son's is by not instilling in them proper values, and instead this thirst for knowledge is filled by corrupted culture. This is a problem. Yes, there are absolutely things that cannot be negotiable by either men or women in terms of mate selection. However, too much emphasis is often placed on what amount to superficial markers of attraction. Attraction is fine, I am pro attraction, but attraction alone is not the recipe for a successful relationship. The idea of forming someone into what you later need them to be is the ultimate exercise in folly. Too many fall into this trap, and it leads to wrecked lives and misery. What you see is what you get anon, if the only thing you have in common with a woman is contained within the realm of the sensual you are setting yourself up for a life of disappointment and failure. Reality doesn't work like we want it to, reality exist as its own Truth. So if you get anything from this piece, let it be this.

Children

Passing on your genes to the next generation is serious business. The problem is that any idiot can do it, look around and bask in this uncomfortable truth. To give your offspring the best chance at a good life the institution of marriage is unbeatable in this regard, and this is reflected in every metric from poverty to mental health. Therefore, I have chosen children as the first benefit of marriage.

Bringing a child into this world changes you, instantly in fact. I cannot think of a more pronounced change to a man's reality than the first time he sets eyes on his child. This isn't hyperbole, this is fact, and any father worthy of the title can verify this. The moment you meet your child you are introduced to a completely new type of love. This love is different from the love you have for your parents, siblings, and bride. It is no more or less special, it is just something that exist in its own context; its own revelation. Its a piece of human existence that you didn't know existed just moments before. This love also marks the beginning of a lifetime of changes and character development that you otherwise would miss out on. The significance of this cannot be overstated, and honestly if this was the only benefit of marriage this alone makes the experience worth it.

The virtues that are refined by the act of fatherhood are legion. Patience, perseverance, temperance, generosity, I could go on. Suffice to say that literally every virtue recognized by mankind is increased exponentially by the work of fatherhood. In return you get the love and adoration of a whole new human. If you do your job well, later in life you will receive the security of having a young person out there with your best interest in mind. Yes, anon you will get old one day (or die young) and you leave this world in much the same way you entered it. Helpless, needy, and in the most tragic of cases: alone.

Ah, loneliness....this is a theme that we will pick up with the next entry in this series. Until next time, Jack.

Thank you as always for reading. If you would be so kind as to give my Twitter some likes, follows, and retweets that would be greatly appreciated. One last favor, if you enjoyed this piece and look forward to the next, go ahead and give me a follow on Sigle on your way out. Thank you so much, your feedback and encouragement mean more to me than I can adequately express.

*The easiest way to DCA your Stacks here